Posted: January 3, 2013 at 4:45 am
2013 Legislative Preview
As the 2013 legislature arrives, here are some bills that I’m told are already being drafted by certain legislators. Some I like, some not. You be the judge. (For those new to the Cowgirl Blog, referring to the 2011 Nutjob Bills may provide some context).
1. Joint Resolution of the House and Senate, acknowledging the earth is significantly greater than 6,000 years old.
2. Joint Resolution, declaring global warming to be bad.
3. Bill requiring all political funding sources to be disclosed, for all groups and candidates, period.
4. Bill requiring mandatory counseling prior to divorce, for candidates running in a GOP gubernatorial primary.
5. Bill forbidding any GOP legislator who votes to take health care from others from benefitting in any way from any aspect of taxpayer funded health care.
6. State income tax increase for large corporations and Montana’s making more than $250,000.
7. Bill to remove carbon monoxide detector in the Governor’s office.
8. Bill to require legislators opposed to medical marijuana to take a lie detector test, about whether they’ve ever smoked it, and how much they smoked.
9. Bill to require a posting, in Capitol Rotunda, of all federal farm subsidy payments to legislators. (Did you know they are mostly TEA Partiers?)
10. Bill to require school children to carry hand-thrown spears and guns with silencers.
11. Constitutional amendment limiting the number of legislative referenda to three per election with citizen-authorized measures with greatest number of signatures taking priority; and raising the vote threshold needed for the legislature to send a measure directly to the ballot, to supermajority.
12. Bill requiring security checkpoints at all public bathrooms, to inspect all transgender Montanans.
13. Bill to establish dog kennel on Capitol grounds, to perpetuate dog-friendly state government.
14. Constitutional Amendment to require use of branding iron by Governor when vetoing.
15. Bill to allow fishing with silencers (and semiautomatics).
16. Bill to allow legislators to be paid in gold dust, pixie stix, or cattle.
17. Sobriety test, breathalyzer before every floor vote.
18. No talking to God unless we ALL get to hear what He’s saying!
19. Mandatory prayer in school. The HAIL MARY!
20. Bill making it illegal to expose plumber’s crack! HT to Sen. Bill Thomass of “discernibly turgid penis” fame.
21. Bill making it illegal for all fat broads to expose their tattoos on their boobs! THIS grosses me out more than any turgid penis or butt crack! Exposed boob tattoos will ONLY be allowed on sailors, carnies, convicts, and good lookin’ biker chics. All OTHER corpulent cuties must cover them up!
22. NO militia bills can be introduced by ANY ReePube who HASN’T seen combat in one of our nations wars!
23. NO outta stater legislator can introduce seccession bills, esPECIALLY thosed dufus bastards from down south!
18. No talking to God unless we ALL get to hear what He’s saying!
Yes, and make sure he speaks English.
HONEY I SHRUNK THE COWGIRL! Or more specifically, Cowgirl shrank herself! BraVO, Cowgirl! You managed to make yourself small enough to actually JOURNEY inside the Teatard brain to see how it works! Hence, your spectular proposed bills above! Good job! Not MANY intelligent folks are able to fully understand just HOW small minded the Teatarded ReePubes really are! Yet you have done it FOR us! By going inSIDE the Teatard brain!
The Teatard/hypocrite/ReePube mind really IS a sight to behold, a teensy, tiny little sight, but a sight none-the-less!
How DO they rage against all that hated gubmint money yet SUCK up all they can?! Rage, suck! Rage, suck! Rage, suck! They are a wonderment of nature!
It’s sort of like the tides, Larry. How do they work? :)
Hantwitty says they’re “animals”!! That’s pretty low, but that’s what he calls’em! All them hated gubmint suckers are animals, like nearly ALL the Teatards in the Lege!
http://crooksandliars.com/karoli/no-low-too-low-hannity-who-compares-poor-an
Does anyone have any compilations of farm subsidy payments to legislators ready? We don’t need a law passed to post them in the Rotunda. As taxpayers, we have that right. We just gotta take ownership and do it, and I think it’s a good idea and a good civics project. I’ve done some number crunching for our local yokels. It’s a little tedious cuz you gotta tease out who’s the brother-in-law of whom etc. But it’s fascinating and makes a great juxtaposition to their rabid anti-govt. rhetoric. How ’bout we get a list done by next week? You can get ahold of me at blacroix@cybernet1.com
If they give us some grief about the Rotunda I’m sure we can figure out an equally visible spot in OUR capitol building.
Let’s do something.
Here is a report on last session farm subsidy recipients.
http://www.bozemandailychronicle.com/news/article_0fdeec6c-534c-11e0-8c41-001cc4c002e0.html
Http://www.thepolicyinstitute.org/web_report.pdf
I am pleased to see that the dems are actually coming up with some good ideas here to fix some of the problems with the legislative process. Where were these bills last session!?!
I HEAR YA, DUDE! That turgid penis bill really should be LAW right now! Along with all the OTHER goofy bills that the ReePubes introduced! THAT would’a otter fixed the legislative process REAL good!
Rage/suck! Rage/suck! Rage/suck! It’s cosmic, dude! The ReePubes are the ying and yang of the political universe! And really, have you EVER seen a bigger bunch of ying yangs? Me neither!
Hope this helps.
Let the craziness begin again this year! This sure looks like a repeat!
We should require the cost of legislative referenda to come from the legislature’s budget–both for the cost of having their garbage on the ballot and the cost of implementing their garbage ideas.
Teabag ‘Redux’ for 2013, coming to and from an insane asylum near you!! Kerns leading the way as usual, GUNS, guns, and GUNZ!
http://farm.ewg.org/ Note, the scrooges who wanted to KILL
food for our hungry, children and those in want…Milburn, Janna Taylor, Brendan and others all had their snouts in the trough while VOTING to nullify and secede…their hypocrisy knows no bounds.
19. Require that the committee chairs actually allow public comment and input and don’t cut people off just so they can get to go out on the town to their booze parties and random hookups. I mean is that too much to ask? Last session was shameful!
WTFaaaaaa?!!!! You mean to tell me that THIS dude hasn’t moved to Montana yet??!! Hey, Pastord Bulbdim, he’s your kinda people!
And really, anyone who wants to wack Newt Getrich is OKay in my book!
But just LOOK at this dude closely. Can you HONESTLY say that this dude HASN’T played hide the pickle with the other fellas????
http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2013/01/03/former-navy-chaplain-gingrich-worthy-of-death-for-supporting-marriage-equality/
DOPEY, WE HARDLY KNEW YE?
Sad, so sad, that we won’t have this stoopid bastard to kick around any more. But HEY, we’ve still got Jerkoff Jerry Moolen!
http://www.greatfallstribune.com/viewart/20130103/NEWS01/301030018/Rehberg-rules-out-another-run-he-leaves-office
Dear Dopey Reeburp, I feel your pain…….AND IT FEELS GOOD!
bwhahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
The real Dopey came out today, the mean, nasty, bitter, teensy, tiny, little mean-spirited pissant pretend rancher who wants to spend time diddlin’ his sheep again! At LEAST his sheep didn’t talk back like Montanans did!
http://mtstreetfighter.com/rehberg-montana-voters-bitch-and-moan-too-much/
Had to laugh at the bill to take the carbon monoxide detector out of the Gov.’s office. What’s the plan there, Stan?